Thursday, February 9, 2012

Newt Gingrich, Just Shut Up Already!

Is there a bigger idiot in politics these days than Newt? I say no. My evidence?

Newt Gingrich said in a statement today,
"With today's decision on marriage by the Ninth Circuit, and the likely appeal to the Supreme Court, more and more Americans are being exposed to the radical overreach of federal judges and their continued assault on the Judeo-Christian foundations of the United States. The Constitution of the United States begins with 'We the People'; it does not begin with 'We the Judges'. Federal judges need to take heed of that fact. Federal judges are substituting their own political views for the constitutional right of the people to make judgments about the definition of marriage."

Really, Newton? You're trying to become the President of the United States of America, and you use the logic of an eight year old in your arguments?  Wait, I don't mean to insult eight year old kids...

Let's try replacing some words in your argument to see how well it holds up:

"With today's decision on suffrage... more and more Americans are being exposed to the radical overreach of federal judges and their continued assault on the male dominated foundations of the United States. The Constitution of the United States begins with 'We the People'; it does not begin with 'We the Judges'. Federal judges need to take heed of that fact. Federal judges are substituting their own political views for the constitutional right of the men to make judgments about their superiority."

Ok, that was just for fun. Let's use a really good one.

"With today's decision on slavery ... more and more Americans are being exposed to the radical overreach of federal judges and their continued assault on the economic foundations of the United States. The Constitution of the United States begins with 'We the People'; it does not begin with 'We the Judges'. Federal judges need to take heed of that fact. Federal judges are substituting their own political views for the constitutional right of the people to make judgments about their property (slaves)."

hmmm. Me thinks it doesn't hold up very well.

You see, Newton, you need to take heed of the fact that we have a Republican form of government here in the United States. You are a "constitutional scholar," at least you say you are. I know you teach it in college courses. Your poor students... If you'd just pay attention to your own studies, you would understand that our form of government is setup to protect individuals and individual rights. It is not designed to operate based on mob rule.

The vast majority of people in the United States are allowed to enter into a contract with someone else that grants them special legal privileges. As far as the state is concerned, that's all a marriage is! It's a contract between two adults that says they are committed to each other. A marriage binds property and finances to the couple. It allows privileges in a host of circumstances that may arise in one or both of their lives.

Sure, legal contracts could be drawn up to grant most of these privileges to a same sex couple, but why should they have to concern themselves with all the details (and expense) that would go into setting them up when the rest of us get the benefit of one simple term that covers it all, marriage.

Let them have it! If it's our right, then it's theirs, too. Besides, Newton, how is it hurting you? How is it harming your beloved Judeo-Christian lifestyle or institutions? Are they forcing their lifestyle on you? Are they carriers of some disease that only manifests itself with a marriage contract? Will they ever - ever - be a member of your church? If they can marry, does it mean that we'll be surrounded by same sex couples? Like there's so many of them you've never seen just waiting to become a majority when marriage is legal for them? Is their behavior going to be responsible for you going to hell? I think we both know that's not the case. You're going to hell - if there is one - for a host of other, well publicized, reasons. No need to expound further...

You and Mitt (another joke) throw around terms like "unelected Judges are overstepping their [fill in the blank]." Well, of course they're unelected, you idiot! You of all people, a "constitutional scholar," should know that they're not elected because they would never be able to reach an unbiased conclusion on any case if they were beholden to you and your corporate money and warped views and massive ego! They don't have to please you!  That's the law!  Yeah, that's the law and it's eating you up that we don't have to live by the same values that you live by.  Good thing!

You, sir, have been educated well beyond your intelligence! Your ignorance is astounding! And the fact that you've gotten as far in your political career - to be so close to becoming the next president - is shameful. Shame on us, the citizens of this great country, for allowing you, with your your self-serving lifestyle and obvious distaste for individual rights, for allowing your achievements.

Just looking at you makes me sick! There oughta be a law...